Loretta Lynn is a horrible cook!

If you're ever in Hurricane Mills, TN and you see Loretta Lynn's Kitchen and Gift Shop and think "Oh, I bet that's some good country food", think again, turn around and go to McDonald's or the BBQ place in the trailer. But first, I guess I should explain why we were in that area of TN. In late July we sold Jeremy's Jeep and have been looking for a car or van that would get better gas mileage than the Jeep's 10 MPG. We've been to all the dealerships, looked on Auto Trader, Craigslist, and EBay Motors. Everyone is taking advantage of the high gas prices and cars are so overpriced right now it's ridiculous. So we found several cars on EBay and bid on a few of them, but didn't get them. Finally about 2 weeks ago I see this fabulous car and tell Jeremy we should bid on it. We had both agreed early on to get a car that is not going to be expensive to repair, but I just couldn't resist this one. Well, long story short, our bid was the highest and we are now the proud owners of a Mercedes-Benz!



This is what eventually led us to drive 4 hours each way to Pulaski, TN. So that's what we did this Saturday, which in turn led us to the horrible mistake that was Loretta Lynn's Kitchen and Gift Shop.
You pull up to what looks somewhat like a Cracker Barrel - the country crap on the outside of a fake log cabin with rocking chairs and John Deer signs flanked by picture windows showcasing Ceramic Dolls, Loretta Lynn Cd's and other household essentials for the Southern Trailer Park. OK, so far it's living up to my expectations of the "One Stop Eat and Shop". After perusing the monogrammed coffee mugs, "I love TN" shot glasses and the shelves and shelves of Loretta Lynn souvenirs we decided it was time to try the food. I should also mention it was 12:00pm on a Saturday afternoon. We just knew that we would be fighting for a place to sit with every Senior Citizen within a 45 mile radius. We should have been tipped off when there were 5 empty spaces right by the front door. We are led from the Gift Shop area to a "Seat Yourself" area that is just indescribable, but I'll give it a shot. It just made me sick. It made me dislike Loretta Lynn horribly. Think of a CK's restaurant. Now make it 2 times bigger, 2 times dirtier, way more country, throw in about 200 Loretta Lynn pictures, and that's the decore (I'm so sorry CK's. You are 5 Star compared to this horrible, horrible trap that calls itself a restaurant). There is just no comparing the food. I can not think of a time that I have ever eaten garbage before now. We had the extremely overpriced $10.99 buffet that consisted of barely any food, but lots and lots of heat lamps! You know when you were a kid and your grandmother cooked and it was soooo good, but then as you got older and she got older her cooking started to go. The lady in the kithcen must have been over 100, because this food should have been thrown out about 5 days ago. It had been reheated so many times. The one thing I thought I could count on to at least fill me up was the good old country staple - cornbread. How can a "Country Kitchen" screw up cornbread??? When I was in the 4th grade I made corn bread for 4-H and won the regional first place prize. Do you know what this means??? A 4th grader makes better corn bread than Loretta Lynn's Kitchen!
Loretta Lynn, please take my advice and take your name off of this shit hole posing as a restaurant. You should have the person in charge of your P.R. killed! One of two things is clearly obvious, Loretta Lynn; you have never eaten at Loretta Lynn's Kitchen and Gift Shop or you have gotten so old that your taste buds no longer work!
Please warn others not to make the same mistake as us. Buying a car on EBay turned out to be a great experience. Keeping our lunch down was much harder.